Once again Twitter is flooded with support today for one mummy who lost her darling 9 month old girl, Matilda Mae, in her sleep to SIDS, only 2 short months ago. Today though, is a happy day, a day of hope, a day when the charity FSID has renamed itself The Lullaby Trust to help raise their voice and a day when mummy bloggers and Twitter unite to spread the word.
Clearly lullabies are very close to my heart and like many, when I saw the devastating tweets from Jennie, I was moved to tears and felt utterly helpless but wanted to do something, however small, to show my support and my empathy. I remember not being able to tweet for days as the usual banal stuff just seemed so insignificant at a time when one mother’s world had come to a grinding, heart breaking halt.
So I did what I often do when emotions are running high and I’m at a loss, I sat down at the piano. It’s not the first time I’ve sat at a piano writing songs with a slightly shaky hand on tear stained paper. It’s what I do at such times, though being dumped was usually what took me there so 9 years of marriage in, I’ve not written many heart-wrenching ballads of late.
However, without stopping to think, I wrote from the heart. I wrote what I would want to say to my dear babies in that earth-shattering situation that we can barely bring ourselves to think about. My sentiment was that a mother and her baby should not be parted. I would want to find my baby and join her up on her cloud and hold her tight until the end of my days. The result was My Angel, a lullaby for Matilda Mae.
My Angel – in memory of Matilda Mae
Words and Music by Sarah ffelan, 2013
If I was an angel,
I’d flutter on by,
And hold your hand
As we watched the world go
Floating by.
I’d hold you close.
I’d hold you tight.
I’d be your star,
You’d be my light.
And I’d never let you go
Oh no.
But you’re now my angel
And you’ve floated to the sky.
Don’t feel alone out there, baby.
Mummy’s still close by.
You are my star.
You are my light.
In my heart,
Day and night.
And I’ll never let you go.
You are my Angel
My shining star
And my heart will be with you
Wherever you are.
And one day, I’ll be an Angel
And I’ll flutter to where you are
And hold you close, my baby,
My bright shining star.
But until then, my baby,
I’ll keep you in my heart
I was quite overwhelmed by the response and very touched when Jennie chose to use it in her goodbye for Matilda Mae.
Please show your support for The Lullaby Trust
You can listen to the lullaby here http://soundcloud.com/sarah-ffelan/my-angel